The way you talk..

The way you talk is like a
broken record on loop
a frostbite in june
like trying to get gum out of your hair
like an owl hooting at midnight
thunder without lightning
like getting across a frozen lake with stilts
like a debate about politics
a preacher telling his autobiogaphy
like a go-kart on the infinity loop
like sharing a room with a cat and a dog
like a bear hibernating and forgot to wake up
a snail racing with slug
like being stuck in quicksand
like a sloth learning how to walk
like trying to do a math question when you forgot how to

First day of Primary School

                          

 Trying to crack a smile

Staring into the lens of the camera in the hands of my mother

I clenched the plastic handle of my trolly bag

glancing back

the thought of a new place and faces gave me chills

but now it's just a memory

For my measly skinny body in that clean-cut iron pinafore,

 my freshly- cut straight tomboy hair,

and my stirred emotions 

could not have helped but fear the unknown

Each step i took to get closer

were even worse than the first

i was alone

but now I'm accustomed

walking to my first class was an accomplishment

But i would cry after

Then i felt like no one would understand

So i cried until someone did

But now i understand

But they still won't

Kids are a like clay

You have to shape them

or they will never learn

But be gentle

we feel things that even you won't realise

Re: The earliest (not really) memory i have

        I remember going to the kindergarten i so dearly loved everyday where I had so much fun playing and learning.  At that time i was taking on mandarin which was really easy for me considering i was an Indian, I made great friends there. But time passed by and my parents couldn't afford sending me there anymore. I remember waking up that day wearing a different, plain blue uniform with a skirt that i dreaded wearing because of the fact i was noticeably a tomboy.

 The environment and teachers were different, as in not a good different; That was the first time i felt like i didn't belong. I hated studying, especially Tamil. It was some sort of alien language at first with all those twists and turns if you don't do it right you'd have to do it all over again just like math, another subject i despise till this very day.

 I still remember that day when i really had to go to the bathroom and my teacher wouldn't let me go because she wasn't done saying out the alphabet, at that time she was around B. When a person has to go to the bathroom let them go to the bathroom unless you want to clean up what they couldn't hold in. This happened twice in my life so far.

I was pretty traumatized by the public education system that i struggled with academics and didn't bother about it until it had long term effects on me. Seeing how everyone else is succeeding ahead of me really brought all those regrets back again and again. I'll just have to admit that there's always going to be someone better then me, yet there is no damage done in doing your best; my advice is don't ever give up no matter the circumstances.

The earliest memory i have.

I was 3. My family and I boarded the plane to Perth, Australia. Let me just remind you i was 3, which meant i was young which leads to hyper-activeness in my case, And that in which my lovely mother decided to give me drowsy flu medicine to make me sleep the rest of the flight. I suppose i don't blame her, i mean, who would want an over-excited 3 year old running around wreaking havoc causing pain and turmoil to many,many innocent passengers. So much for my first flight experience. After we reached the Australian airport, we stayed in a self-contained small room in a motel . As typical Singaporeans the first  thing we did was look for food, now, we visited different places for a variety. The only restruant I could remember, or at least my brother could remember was Hungry Jack's. We also visited a friend of ours who was Singaporean. Me and my brother played in their backyard with his two daughters.I should also mention that in Singapore 80% of the population lives in HDB Flats,which means i have never been in a backyard in my entire life and seeing that was an amazing life accomplishment(at that time). I played with one of the girls on the swings. Unable to hide my amazing swinging skills i slowly let go of the swing for the finale. Unknowing of the fact that they had a dog, and that the dog 'goes' in the backyard. it's pretty much self-explanatory of what i landed on. that was one of those memories that will haunt me even in my adult years. The last thing i remember was that we visited  an isolated and peaceful park. My mother told me i couldn't restrain myself from running around and trying to climb everything without caring about anything and everything. I distinctively remember balancing on a log and knowing i won't ever fall. if only i had these attitudes today. These are some parts of what i could remember during the time i spent there the rest was kind of a blur like returning back, i never remembered coming back on the plane. Hmm.. i wonder why?.

Am I sedentary or physical

                             

Well,I used to be physical. when I was younger, my mother told me that I was extremely hyper-active. always jumping off the walls,running around without a care in the world. I was even in 

the track and field team in primary school. I love sports! ( only some sports). but now that I'm older  I find instead of running around outside and playing in mud , I'm just at home either sitting in my tiny bedroom doing my homework with the laptop by my side or watching television. I know it's not a good lifestyle but even with the oppurtunity of  fresh air I reject in a heart beat. I just feel no reason to go outside anymore when I have everything I need and want at home. it sometimes feel like I 'm hiding from the outside world with all the judgement and weird things happening like abductions, murders e.t.c.. I can be safe in my home where no one cares what I look like or what I do or how I do it. And what about friends you say? with this highly developed world we have we can use social-networking to keep in touch. but, I still feel like I'm missing something. I don't want to spend all my life in my tiny room. there are so many amazing things and people in this world I haven't tried or met yet. I know this life is only temporary I don't have to make the most of it , but because this life is temporary I HAVE to make the most of it. no one should let fear stop them from achieving what could have been. So the answer to the question, am I physical or am I sedentary? I am sedentary but I need to be physical.